Thursday, May 24, 2012

how to scrub the kitchen floor

They say things come easier in pairs:
Body parts, marriages, games.

Even those that do not require
Symmetry. But when it comes to

Cleaning the kitchen floor,
I prefer one hand, particularly

The right. Some distractions
Are worth tending to.

And there is no use
Ignoring any of them.

We only have this moment
To imprison the freedom

Of our migrant knowledge.
The left has just to be

As preoccupied as the other.
Like every young, troubled lovers

Solution: Cut him some slack.
Cut her some flowers.

But despite the scattering of salt,
Pepper, onion skin and oil,

The floor is a guarded wisdom:
Love becomes stranger

To those who think
They know it too well.

I may have no dialect, no gift
As enduring as marble or linoleum

But I know of the hundred peso bill
Underneath the stove. Its worth,

Its apparent, minuscule loss
In a purse or leather wallet.

I will keep mum about it.
And this Saturday, when I scrub

The kitchen floor with a dirtied
Sponge, I will reach for the money,

My body an inch from the floor,
Getting closer, almost like in worship,

In surrender or in perverted delight,
My other hand void of anything

So as to clutch my chest with
And feel my heart beating fast.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

what follows will always be necessary


It is the month of May. Aside from sand, sea, and sun (and nowadays, a little bit of rain), it is the season of writers workshops. You know, those little groupings that allow little men to discuss and rant off intents, objective correlatives, punctuation marks, caesuras, etc. for a couple of days with big men as their necessary acoustics

Dumaguete (2008)

And since the Millennials are said to be harbingers of glorifying nostalgia, even if my belonging to it remains to be debatable, I would not ignore this opportunity to skip a few years back with these mandatory snapshots and, well, notice what has transpired from this to this.


Iligan (2008)

 The memories that cling to them are eerie, but I think that is the point of recollection. To know which to hold on to, which to steer clear of. They may be still recognizable but they could be unusual now. Things do change.


Bacolod (2010)
  
Well, I believe there will never be a path that leads to an absolute destination, there will never be sameness (there could be a hint), there will never be symmetry of the sort that would make Wes Anderson blush. There is only incongruence, there is only difference, and maybe even chaos, the kind that completely distorts, if not erases, the trajectory of Point A to Point B, making you ask, “Where is he now? What happened to her? or “Why?

But it seems they do not really matter that much. What follows is what is important, what will always be necessary. The practice of writing, after all, is a self-imposed struggle of looking back while plunging headfirst into possibilities, good or bad. Now, I could only glance at the photos with a wry smile. I am going to Dumaguete in a few hours. 

Wednesday, May 09, 2012

with the wild things now


The news of the death of children’s writer and illustrator Maurice Sendak rings all over the internet like fire bell last night. And that news still pains me this morning, deeply. The image above has been my computers wallpaper for almost two years, a screenshot taken from Spike Jonze’s movie adaptation of Sendak’s children’s book Where the Wild Things Are (the movie, bearing the same title, is the most heart-wrenching film I’ve seen in 2009). It shows Max, the child protagonist, and a Wild Thing, cleverly named as Carol, leisurely walking in a vast desert.

I was never quite sure why I stuck to this picture for a long time until I re-read the book last night. I think I get it. I think it tells me that there’s a lifelong link between us, young ones and old ones, and a Wild Thing, that no matter how far we go, a Wild Thing will be forever with us, in us, bursting with outsized life, animated, daring, maybe even terrifying, and that we need a little bit of nightmares to get through the petty hardships, the requisite trials in life, the vast desert, to “let the wild rumpus start!” when a situation calls for it.

For that thought alone, I feel better. Even if Sendak has gone, his Wild Things are still with me,  along with the rest of the Maxs in the world. And wherever he is going, I am sure that somewhere he will find his supper waiting for him “still warm. 

Thursday, May 03, 2012

the storm is in the papers

Edited by Khavn de la Cruz and Joel M. Toledo, Under The Storm: An Anthology of Contemporary Philippine Poetry is a collection of a hundred or so poems released last year, around September, that is why I am surprised to learn that a review has surfaced in the pages of The Philippine Star just last Monday. 

What is more surprising is for columnist Mr. Juaniyo Arcellana to notice my contribution, Stones, and circle his thoughts on one of the seven parts of the piece. Flattery. Now I can appreciate that axiom better late than never more than the usual. Next mission: get a clipping of that news article.

Monday, April 30, 2012

pieces here and there

For the most part of the first quarter, the pens dry. There have been revisions here and there but those are different things. Entirely different from that peculiar rush of nursing a new baby, a new piece. This must be because of being caught up with other responsibilities both relevant and not.

I sorely need the push.

And then came the little bits of news. Early last month, Ive received an e-mail telling my poems inclusion in Montage, the official literary folio of University of Santo Tomas The Varsitarian. It was comforting news, especially when I thought the poem The Storms Around Us had nowhere to go.

Later last week, another editor e-mailed me that a poem of mine, How to Identify a Crisis Without Really Trying, is up at the Philippines Free Press website. Delightful, just delightful.

Today, I think and hope I already have the needed push.

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

19th iligan national writers workshop fellows

Finally, here’s the announcement of fellows for the 19th Iligan National Writers Workshop.  Wow, 19th batch. It feels like our 15th happened a long, long time ago. Anyway, seeing the list, there’s no doubt this is going to be an interesting batch. Enjoy the city of Iligan, Marvin, Phillip, Glenn, and Jesus! And to the rest of the fellows, congratulations!

*

19 out of 106 applicants qualified in this year's 19th Iligan National Writers Workshop (INWW) to be held on May 14-18, 2012 at the MSU-IIT and at the Elena Tower Inn, Iligan City.

Hosted by the MSU-IIT Office of the Vice Chancellor for Research & Extension,
this workshop is funded by the National Commission for Culture and the Arts (NCCA) and the MSU-IIT Office of the Chancellor.

The 15 writing fellows are funded by the NCCA while four of the writing fellows are funded by sponsors: Boy Abunda, and Ricardo Jorge S. Caluen, and Foundations: the Manuel E. Buenafe Writing Fellowship and the Bai Zaima Mamalinding Mother & Child Foundation, Inc..

The Jimmy Y. Balacuit, Sr. Literary Awards are likewise given to the most promising works by the writing fellows at the close of the workshop.

The writing fellows are:

Luzon
Tomas Agulto (Poetry, Filipino)
Marvin Einstein Sarmiento Mejaro (Fiction, Filipino)
Pia Montalvan (Fiction, Filipino)
Glenn L. Diaz (Fiction, English)
Phillip Y. Kimpo, Jr. (Fiction, English)

Visayas
Norman T. Darap (Fiction, Kiniray-a)
Jesus Catigan Insilada (Fiction, Kiniray-a)
Jessrel Escaran Gilbuena (Poetry, Cebuano)
Jenelyn Villegas Garcia (Poetry, Waray)
Francis Senolos (Poetry, Waray)
Aurea Lynne Geronimo (Play, Filipino)

Mindanao
Teomie Langamin Nale, Jr. (Poetry, Cebuano)
Jermafe Kae Angelo Prias (Poetry, English)
Sittie Urdoja G. Madale (Poetry, Maranao)
Anne Solon Senajon (Play, Cebuano)
Karlo Antonio Galay David (Play, Filipino)
Cheryl Love P. Sumagat (Play, Filipino)
Diandra-Ditma Aguam Macarambon (Fiction, English)
Iryne Ole Kaamino (Fiction, Cebuano)


The Evaluators:
Merlie M. Alunan, Nelia G. Balgoa, SPC Fernandez, Roger Garcia, Man Gervacio, Christine Godinez-Ortega, Tonton Daposala, Zola Gonzalez Macarambon, Phil Harold Mercurio, Raul Moldez, Maimona W. Magayoong and John Iremil Teodoro.

Panelists this year:
Merlie M. Alunan, Antonio R. Enriquez, Leoncio P. Deriada, SPC Fernandez, German V. Gervacio, J. Neil C. Garcia, John Iremil Teodoro, Macario D. Tiu, C Godinez-Ortega, and the keynote speaker, Victorio N. Sugbo.

Monday, April 16, 2012

holy boholy! here's a reflection!

I was in my hometown last holy week. On the first day of being free from the doldrums of the metro, an acquaintance of mine asked, what would you be doing? My immediate response was, of course, I’d be enjoying it like any other vacation I’ve had. Out of religious partiality or maybe something else, another question was set forth on the table: I thought you’d be reflecting. The week is for reflecting, right?




Hey, I think I have reflected too much Jean Piaget would be proud of my egocentricity. Besides, reflection is practiced (or should be practiced) every day, not only in this particular week. For how could anyone learn the weavings of living if ruminations are limited for six or seven days? Sometimes, I just couldn’t help but laugh at some of these age-old traditions.



So for the long holiday, forgive me, I opted for leisure. Armed with new music from Kimbra, Moonface, TV Girl, Beach House, Ramona Falls, and Coldplay, I went back to my favorite beach in Panglao, dipped in pools when the former was not enough, feasted in new food spots around town, stood as parent for a dear fellow’s college graduation, received truths that were unbelievable to grasp, listened to my sister and nephew play the piano beautifully, bonded with family over games of Scrabble, Monopoly, Boggle, and many more. I even made cupcakes and other desserts (along with three pairs of hands) in long afternoons. Fortunately, they were a success.


I could rattle out a hundred reasons why I did what I did, but I think this is enough: at my age, I have to know what is important to me, know who are important to me, and stick to them. This is one reflection I could share to anyone. For now.

Thursday, April 12, 2012

51st silliman university national writers workshop fellows

Finally, after five long years, there’s a Sillimanian in this summer’s Silliman University National Writers Workshop. Five years. I remember finding myself wide-eyed at being surrounded by amazing people (in all shapes and sizes) in that workshop last 2008, my first, and comforted at the thought that writing was something I’d really love to do. Even though I personally don’t know my next-in-line, I still find it a great relief. Also, congratulations to Debbie and the rest of the fellows!

*

National Writers Workshop Director-in-Residence Rowena Tiempo Torrevillas and Silliman University are pleased to announce that the following writers have been accepted as fellows for the 51st Silliman University National Writers Workshop scheduled on April 30-May 18, 2012 at the Silliman University Rose Lamb Sobrepeña Writers Village, Camp Lookout, Valencia.

For Poetry

CD Borden (University of San Carlos)
Deborah Rosalind Nieto (University of Santo Tomas)

For Fiction

Michael Aaron Gomez (Silliman University)
Thomas David Chavez (Philippine Normal University)
Michelle Abigail Tiu Tan (Ateneo de Manila University)
Christian Tablazon (University of the Philippines–Diliman)
Timothy James Dimacali (University of the Philippines-Diliman)
Ma. Vida Frances Cruz (Ateneo de Manila University)

For Creative Non-Fiction

Hazel Meghan Hamile (University of the Philippines–Mindanao)
Zendy Victoria Sue Valencia (University of Santo Tomas)

For Drama
Karlo Antonio David (Ateneo De Davao University)

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

12th iyas creative writing workshop fellows

Congratulations, Ynna and Miro! You can stop eating right now. The city of Bacolod would probably fill you up with a year’s worth of sumptuous food. Pasalubong!

*

The IYAS Creative Writing Workshop of the University of St. La Salle (USLS), Bacolod City, has selected 15 Fellows for 2012, out of 81 applicants from the country and abroad. Here are fellows:

Fiction Fellows

Maria Amparao Warren (English)
Brylle B. Tabora (English)
Chuckie Perez Manio (Filipino)
Anthony de la Cruz (Filipino)
Daryl Nino Toring Jabil (Cebuano)
Fr. Reynaldo Villanoy Jr. (Hiligaynon)

Poetry Fellows

Miro Frances D. Capili (English)
Ramon Enrico Damasing (English)
Early Sol Gadong (Hiligaynon)
GL John Clavel Haro (Hiligaynon)
Mariane A.R.T. Abuan (Filipino)
Gratian Paul R. Tidor (Cebuano)
CD Borden (Cebuano)

Drama Fellows

Fundador Tipon III (Hiligaynon)
Mario Mendez (Filipino)

IYAS will interface with the Kritika National Workshop on Art and Cultural Criticism sponsored by the De La Salle University Bienvenido N. Santos Creative Writing Center (BNSCWC) and the National Commission for Culture and the Arts (NCCA) which will also be held on the same dates at USLS.

The interface activities are: film screening of “Oro, Plata, Mata” by Peque Gallaga; a craft and reading lecture by Dr. Stuart Cooke; and an introduction to Negrense culture through trips to cultural landmarks in Talisay, Silay, and Victorias cities.

The IYAS Workshop Director is Dr. Marjorie Evasco and the panelists for this year are Dr. Genevieve Asenjo, Dr. Ronald Baytan, Prof. Danilo M. Reyes, Ms. Grace Monte de Ramos, Mr. John Iremil Teodoro, and guest panelist Dr. Cooke from Australia. IYAS Founder Dr. Elsie Coscolluela also sits in the panel.

The IYAS Creative Writing Workshop is co-sponsored by the BNSCWC and the NCCA, and will be held on April 22 – 28, 2012 at the Balay Kalinungan Complex of the USLS, Bacolod City.

Friday, March 30, 2012

birthday wishes

I rarely speak of wishes, save for my wanton requests of presents for people who have the means to provide them. Yes, I am that kind of person, now judge me. As I lay in bed the other day, sick and sore on my birthday of all days, thanks to the flu or some kind of bug, random aspirations whirred before my eyes like some Egyptian vision, Hollywood-style. There are a lot more that have sprung in my head, but these are all I could recall right now:

  • I wish desires are never severe.
  • I wish I would know what to do with this hair.
  • I wish I would start memorizing a poem in each month.
  • I wish my dearest loves would have faith in a poem.
  • I wish I would have faith in myself, bright and constant.
  • I wish my dearest loves would curse a little bit less, if not entirely shun the habit altogether.
  • I wish my dearest loves would smoke a little bit less, if not entirely shun the habit altogether.
  • I wish my dearest loves would read and write more other than curse and smoke more.
  • I wish I would start my own book, as what J.T. has said.
  • I wish I would finish reading those books.
  • I wish I would find something better soon.
  • I wish I would find someone better soon.
  • I wish I would be a better person.
  • I wish I would be less frank.
  • I wish people would be frank.
  • I wish I would be healthier.
  • I wish I would find the right reason that I should smile a lot more.
  • I wish I would be good at remembering names.
  • I wish I would be good at remembering directions.
  • I wish I know where I want to go.
  • I wish I know where to look.
  • I wish people would be more perceptive.
  • I wish people would be honest at the right place, at the right time.
  • I wish people would be more respecting of each other.
  • I wish people would know what needs to be kept and what needs to shared.
  • I wish the ghosts would transfer to another house, to another memory.
  • I wish memory would be less invasive.
  • I wish I would be more humble.
  • I wish my grip on forgiveness would be less unbending.
  • I wish I would smile a lot more (if needed).
  • I wish I would finally start learning how to play a musical instrument. (Piano-widow doesn’t count).
  • I wish I would keep some of my complaints to myself.
  • I wish people would just shut up.
  • I wish I would travel a lot more.
  • I wish I would read a lot more.
  • I wish I would write a lot more.
  • I wish I would stop thinking that something is wrong.
  • I wish I would know when to stop.
  • I wish I would know when to start.
  • I wish I would accomplish something very significant soon.
  • I wish for a month of zero discontent at the soonest time possible.
  • I wish everyone a month of zero discontent.
  • I wish all of us would relish this month of zero discontent.
  • I wish my thoughts are bearable.
  • I wish the world is fine, bearable.
  • I wish the thought of you is bearable.
  • I wish you are fine, always.

Sunday, March 25, 2012

there's always next time

I actually feared the specters that loomed in that trip. Last Saturday, I brought myself back to Dumaguete City for the graduation rites of some people whose roots of relevance branch within me, inching deeper in each moment of recollection. My excuse would be “I had to be there.” But of course, it was more than an excuse, more than wanderlust.


They were there in the afternoon when I walked the stage in my toga, too, like cheerleaders who had missed a game and went hollering amongst the crowd of beaming parents on commencement day instead. One drummer from the marching band even banged his drum wildly to the ire of his lead conductor. Just a few steps away from them were my mother, my father, and my three sisters. It was a scene plucked out from a sappy movie.

All these were happening with the great peak of Mount Talinis and Silliman Church guarding behind us, the Rizal Boulevard embracing water right in front of us, and the sun slowly dipping into a horizon that forgot it should separate sea and sky.

Who could not remember? Not even Dumaguete’s strongest rhum could not knock it off my memory.

And yes, memory, the purveyor of the specters mentioned earlier. The requisite ghosts. These are those that manifest after we’ve been through anything (if not everything), soon to be forgotten, only to be relived again with the slightest push of remembrance. The impact will be lasting, whether we like it or not.

Suddenly it was my college acquaintances’ and dearest loves’ turn. The graduates were Donna Amethyst Bernardo, Phillippe Antoni Credo, Ian Rosales Casocot, Gabriel Pestelos, Ayla Calumpang, Julian Torralba, Judy Gay Jandayan, Aris Ramiro, Urich Calumpang just to name a few. It was their turn to face the impact.


I knew from the start that the whole four-day break would be one joyful escapade, but something behind that gloss, a little bit more denied than accepted, was the thought that this would also be heartbreaking. Something worse than hangover.

Why does it have to be this way? How will we see this little city in the south without the predictable, familiar faces? When will we ever meet again? What will be the changes? Who are we returning to next time? Will there be even next time?

It was funny finding ourselves treading uncertainty again. After all these years, we remain stumped and in awe at vagueness of reaching another phase. It’s like a blur in our foresight, as if the only clear thing in our heads is the question, “What’s next?”

Following this four-day break, we will venture onto our own separate ways. But after all these years, I stand by what I have said before. Separation is necessary. To the things you love, to the ones you love.

We couldn’t have enjoyed those meals together in new and all-time favorite restaurants, those morning-the-night revelries in watering holes, those marathon conversations, that three-hour stay in Siquijor, those picture-taking sessions that attempt to frame in images what needs to be preserved, that commencement ceremony itself, that hour-long trip to Tanjay, that “Liwayway Pose” that presented itself out of nowhere, that Twitter hashtag “#ReturnOfTheStars,” those small familial reunions, those big spontaneous gatherings, those fleeting smiles and greetings and many more if not for the heightened absence we have felt beforehand.


Though last minute bad news was received before graduation day, though there were ties that remain broken within the circle, though there were places never visited for fear of meeting past loves, though there were past loves that suddenly persisted in the present, though there were personal announcements withheld to prevent changing the courses of other people’s short-term happiness, we just moved on. The acacias and the boulevard are testaments of endurance.

We may be all victims of the consequences of distance, but this is what makes loving and longing flourish in this city. Maybe next time, our laughter would be louder, our smiles wider, our understanding for each other wiser.

For the new graduates? I guess what matters now are the clinks of glasses and bottles, the shared feeling of accomplishment, the galvanic bliss of it all. We cannot deny them this triumph. They deserve it.


So let us worry on another day. For now, we just have to be happy, have faith that everything will be all right. Until next time.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

how to struggle in a crowded place

There has to be another reason
for negligence, how these cigarette butts
settle next to a clump of grass,
how this city spears the sky.
But always, there is too much
that bothers us, and there is too little
elbow room. So we hurl in the air
the ills that brim in our hands.
Such as our least favorite wants,

such as our most favorite curses.
All the things that make us human.
And since we could not bear
the limits we have made for ourselves,
we linger in the dangers of proximity,
in the grip of common knowledge.
Then we will run out of things to say,
our intentions bottled and blotted
by pleas, by many missing words:

Sorry for. Do not. Strong.
It is because. Grapple. The face.
Forgive. But when. Give space.
In between silence and noise
lies the ballpark figure of caution,
and in here we must own a corner.
The struggle is not what
we have yet to see
but what we already feel.


*

Today is World Poetry Day, so I am sharing here my most recent work. This special day all began in the year 1999 in Paris during UNESCO’s 30th session. As stated in their website, “the main objective of this action is to support linguistic diversity through poetic expression and to offer endangered languages the opportunity to be heard within their communities. Moreover, this Day is meant to support poetry, return to the oral tradition of poetry recitals, promote teaching poetry, restore a dialogue between poetry and the other arts such as theatre, dance, music, painting and so on, support small publishers and create an attractive image of poetry in the media so that the art of poetry will no longer be considered an outdated form of art but one.

“UNESCO encourages the Member States to take an active part in celebrating the World Poetry Day, at both local and national level, with the active participation of National Commissions, NGOs and the public and private institutions concerned (schools, municipalities, poetic communities, museums, cultural associations, publishing houses, local authorities, etc.).”

Friday, March 16, 2012

it's good to have you with us


Many have waxed poetic about Dumaguete, buffing nostalgia into new sheen, romanticizing the past and recently folded present. But who could blame those who have orchestrated them, which actually include me, us and many more, bearing thoughts and experiences from having walked its streets at ungodly hours over and over again for four, five or so years? It is hard to explain, but please forgive us. “To ignore complexity/ is to question the generosity of the sky.”

That is why tomorrow, just as the sun would drain its one o’clock light in the afternoon, I would find myself standing on that city again, breathing in its spirit, to attend my closest acquaintances’ commencement ceremony. Silliman University would be a flurry of smiles (and booze-induced carousing) again. The thought of this alone works like a drug.

And just a few hours ago, that very same drug has conspired with the naughty fates of the day. When I turned on the music player this morning, the sound of piano and spoken word gradually filling my ears, I realized I found the perfect song for this year’s graduates. Especially those graduates that I know of.

*

Exitlude
The Killers

Aggressively we all defend the role we play
Regrettably time’s come to send you on your way
We’ve seen it all bonfires of trust flash floods of pain
It doesn’t really matter don’t you worry it’ll all work out
No it doesn’t even matter don’t you worry what it’s all about
We hope you enjoyed your stay
It’s good to have you with us, even if it’s just for the day
We hope you enjoyed your stay
Outside the sun is shining, seems like heaven ain’t far away
It’s good to have you with us
Even if it’s just for the day
It’s good to have you with us even if it’s just for the day
Outside the sun is shining, seems like heaven ain’t far away
It’s good to have you with us.
Even if it’s just for the day
It’s good to have you with us even if it’s just for the day
Outside the sun is shining, seems like heaven ain’t far away

Friday, March 09, 2012

a.

There is no
Other word for this
But yours,
How memory
Lacerates
Galvanizes
And back again
The wound brought
By the razors
Of your name.

Letters all pointed,
All too ready
To pierce,
To cut
And to pick.
I could no longer hold
The ruptures
Swelling
On recollection’s
Gossamer shell.

There could be thousands
Of deficiencies
That are yet
To be known,
But here is one
I could diagnose
Today: The first fall
Is not the hardest
But how
It unfolds.

Among many other things,
This is what I like
About you:
Even with that cigarette,
That paper article
You burn but hide
On your back
With the fling
Of an arm
In my presence,

There is the absence
Of stains
On your teeth,
Those that mimic
Indulgence
On too much coffee,
Tea or recklessness,
As you blow rings
To the other direction
And quip

An apology
Or two
Like “’Sorry.”
But what
I do not like
About you
Is that you always mean it
For such small things
Like smoke
And nothing more.

Thursday, March 08, 2012

return of a beloved

A few days ago I mentioned bringing my dear Baki, a Canon PowerShot SX200IS, to the service center for a little tweaking. All right, not entirely little. I was about to shell out nearly half of my monthly salary to fix the three-year old thing if not for the humble, gracious, and fault-admitting friend who had swept it off a chair with her butt when she sang a drunken rendition of Whitney Houston’s “All At Once” (or was it Eraserheads’ “Spolarium”?), dropping it dead smack on the marble floor. She had agreed to pay the other half of the repair fees.

One would say she should’ve paid for everything, but I say I shouldn’t have left it on a chair when someone nearby is doing a tribute to a newly-departed favorite, a little bit intoxicated. No more argument.

I just knew on that night that something was wrong when I picked Baki up from the floor, turned it on, and heard a sputtering of mechanical beeps, a message on the screen saying, “Lens error. Restart camera.” Then it turned off by itself, no matter what I did. I eventually accepted this was a camera’s last hurrah to a PC’s Blue Screen of Death.

What was a little bit painful at that time was the warranty benefit of the gadget had expired just two months ago. I asked the consultant at the service center if there was a grace period or an extension for my warranty card
’s power, you know, just to give it a try, but she just smiled and let out an uninspired laugh. Monosyllabic “Ha-ha-ha.” I think it translated to “Cheap-cheap-cheap.”

Of course, I had to press my luck. Even if I had to travel miles to the service center only to find out a new one would be opening three blocks away from where I work the following day (which highlights weak PR), even if I had to get lost on my way there, even if I had to miss documenting mundane things during my camera’s absence, I got to revive my beloved Baki. I couldn’t sum up the milestones in my life, big and small, the camera had witnessed and concretized for me in images. Baki is an electronic poetry.

And things were ironed out in seven days’ time. Thankfully, repair was quick.

So, here it is now, the handheld beauty in my hands. I press a little chrome button, and there goes that faint whir, the barrel zooming out with lens as clear as dew, the screen coming to vivid life. As the flash snaps up in place, ready to take a shot, I feel its entire heft like weighing gold in one’s palms.

Strangely, it’s as if I am seeing something in new light.

Monday, March 05, 2012

bltx 2


Last Friday, March 2, I went home from an expo in QC that was Better Living Through Xeroxography (or better known as BLTX). It was its second edition, and though in paper BLTX was a small affair, its goal was big:

“Bring together independent self-publishers from Metro Manila (hopefully from elsewhere, too), in a one-night event that will allow them to sell their wares: books, yes, but also zines and other printed materials like shirts, postcards, posters, and this year, CDs from musicians more indie than indie.”

And I think the turnout met its goal. Ilyong’s at Kalantiaw was packed, the tables brimming with things not found in malls, and I was glad I spotted faces who I thought I would not be seeing in a while and faces I believe I have not seen in a very long while. Around three in the morning the next day, I went home with a bag heavier than before. Ah, new reads.

Thursday, March 01, 2012

that month again

And it is March. And there is that tingle again, a sharp, downward push on skin, burrowing into every pore like some massive undoing of sweat. It will return, it will be known, this memory violent in its urgency, the same questions surfacing like a howl heard from the other side of the hill, like bad poems read on lonely nights. February will only be remembered for that shirt suited for another season. Or that text message that appeared on screen in fragment, incomplete, saying, “I think when you’re”

Not a period is in sight, not even the suspense of ellipsis. Perhaps it is best to leave some things that way, misplaced and unsaid, to be spared of what we do not want to see, of what we do not want to hear. And in each morning, around eight or nine, we could always say, “Look, there’s too much blue in the sky. I’m sure it wouldn’t rain.”

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

first publication of the year


My poems, “How to Hate the Apostrophes” and “How to Not Write Another Story,” of which I think should be read together and in that specific order, are in this week’s Philippines Graphic (February 27, vol. 22, no. 39, Justice Serafin Cuevas on the cover). I may not have released anything last month, perhaps opening the new year with literary fireworks, but February’s fine with me. It’s better late than never, right? So, let’s keep things rolling, shall we? Good.

Monday, February 27, 2012

perennially lonely


The entire weekend could have ended with a ho-hum sigh of discontent if not for an invitation to an art fair somewhere in Makati. After I handed my broken, beloved camera to its service center (which begs for a different post) late Saturday afternoon, I met up with Sara, ogle at quirky things in the said gathering of buyers and sellers, until both of us thought we have better things to do. Like have a couple of drinks and talk about better things to do.

In the course of the night, Yas from Alabang joined us at a pub near SaGuijo, a café-cum-bar wedged in the maze of San Antonio Village. Eva was supposed to be with us but she had
spiels to do, Sam was practicing how to drive (and joy-riding the entire night), and Philip was happily in love and could not even respond to our calls. Also, someone long thought to be a ghost of the past apparated from somewhere nearby. The latter was a proof of the dangers of proximity. It all happened, unplanned, but it was nonetheless charming. I guess spontaneity is that one rare gem of occasions.

To commemorate the 555th post of this schizophrenic blog, here are some of the things that make up our banter:

  • How a broken compass works as embodied by a person who does not want to read maps.
  • How camera repair service costs as much as a new camera.
  • How a camera is needed in every occasion.
  • How a camera captures what you miss in the blur of an occasion.
  • How people could have beautiful cars at such a young age.
  • How people do not want to have beautiful cars in a lifetime.
  • How that long weekend in June could be the perfect opportunity for trying out that new car.
  • How people need a beautiful beach in every vacation.
  • How rhum becomes the training ground for beginners in a little city somewhere in the Visayas.
  • How most of us face a computer for hours at work.
  • How sub-zero beer works like magic.
  • How three bottles of beer could get you an extra-large shirt.
  • How a family name could scatter all over the country.
  • How a name could sound truly Filipino based on semantics, syntax, and pak! factor.
  • How a name could be pretentious.
  • How a name, a face of the person behind that name that is plastered on a book , which is edited by the person with that name could be the ultimate form of pretentiousness.
  • How that could be a result of miscommunication and graduation gift surprises.
  • How artifice and pretention could easily make an event.
  • How artifice and pretention differ from art and preservation.
  • How some people need to attend the annual Cosmopolitan Bachelor Bash.
  • How some people need to attend the annual FHM’s 100 Sexiest Women.
  • How saddening it could be when a friend who organizes or sponsors these two events forgets to give you your VIP pass.
  • How cigarette differs from electronic cigarette.
  • How an electronic cigarette could only provide a thin feel of smoke.
  • How nicotine makes you addicted to cigarette.
  • How nicotine gum fails at replacing the cigarette.
  • How a climb to Mount Pulag, Luzon’s highest peak, makes you regret of smoking cigarettes.
  • How a climb could be risky.
  • How people take risks.
  • How people should take risks more often.
  • How people keep themselves away from risks.
  • How people see themselves as risks.
  • How any small house, dilapidated or not, could be a venue for emerging, indie bands.
  • How doing so could further establish one’s indie cred.
  • How reconnecting with an old acquaintance sparks new connections.
  • How reconnecting with an old-recent(?) acquaintance sparks something more than connection.
  • How connections should have never been established in the first place.
  • How social media hide in a veil of goals to connect people.
  • How social media perpetuate a culture of delays, especially in writing.
  • How social media sate our human desire to be liked, mentioned, relevant, on the loop.
  • How social media could be a seed for art.
  • How art should always be separated from religion even if it touches on one.
  • How limiting and selfish one’s take on art could be.
  • How artists should be torchbearers of production and not polarization.
  • How polarization could be a fuel for production.
  • How many workshops need funding, as usual.
  • How plagiarism could be a result of subconscious idolization of the text being read.
  • How idolization blurs the line between praise and indolence.
  • How much themes could business owners think to refresh their line of motels.
  • How motels could offer perks with a frequenter’s card. For example, an umbrella.
  • How dental braces perfect and ruin a smile.
  • How longganisa tastes like when dipped in soup.
  • How a face registers to other people, as exemplified by this concern: “I hope he finds someone. Gusto ko siya makitang happy. Parang perennially lonely itong batang to.

And that, people, is how good friends who have never seen each other in a long time talk and backstab at each other from five o’clock in the afternoon to five o’clock in the morning. Yes, we are varsity players in this game of talking too much without really saying that much. Or so it seems.

Friday, February 24, 2012

the new book


This is perhaps one the most exciting news I’ve ever heard in a long while.

“Although I’ve enjoyed writing it every bit as much, my next book will be very different to the Harry Potter series, which has been published so brilliantly by Bloomsbury and my other publishers around the world. The freedom to explore new territory is a gift that Harry’s success has brought me, and with that new territory it seemed a logical progression to have a new publisher. I am delighted to have a second publishing home in Little, Brown, and a publishing team that will be a great partner in this new phase of my writing life.”
- J. K. Rowling

Thursday, February 23, 2012

job(lessness) in literature*


What are we doing and thinking? It was one broad question. Thoughts were running in my head. But when the same question was anchored as to how I see myself in relation to Jose Rizal and the nation, my focus settled on this assumption: I think the very germ of what we are currently doing and thinking is we are escaping.

We escape to possibilities. We find escape to find respite or simple entertainment. We become escapers as practicing writers.

And this is where I think the problem lies. We have escaped too much, too regularly, that we have distanced ourselves too far from reality.

What made Jose Rizal a force to reckon with was his ways of unmasking the troubles of this country. He reminded people through two novels about corruption of the government, the unjust treatment in the society, and a whole lot of other abuses. In other words, Jose Rizal showed truth. Or, rather, what was true and stirring in his time.

So, what truth could we show now? What could be our primary concern? Here is one truth that seems to be very palpable today: job and the absence of it. Not only in reality but also in fiction.

Hundreds of stories have been spun about love and other feelings. There are also abundant stories about trips to the outer space. Even the occasional rubbing of elbows with creatures of horror has its fair share in today’s literary scene (especially with the rising popularity of the so-called speculative fiction). But when it comes to human labor and its nature, we read very little about it.

As far as I can remember in local literature, we have the secretary Miss Mijares and the carpenter in Kerima Polotan Tuvera’s “The Virgin.” We have the real estate agent Divina in Rosario Cruz Lucero’s “Good Husbands and Obedient Wives.” There’s also the group of people who cope with getting fired in Ian Rosales Casocot’s “Yeah Baby Take It All In Bitch.” As for stories from foreign authors, we have the diagnosis analyst in Jhumpa Lahiri’s “The Interpreter of Maladies.” There’s also the baker in Raymond Carver’s “A Small Good Thing.”

On the surface, these may seem just another set of stories on relationships, lives bumping or stumbling on another, but the characters’ jobs here are crucial, figuring not only as cosmetic devices but also triggers of emotion, of psyches, shaping the general environment of the story.

Today, instead of something that bears considerable weight, work merely receives the wallpaper treatment. A job is often thrown in as just another detail, an extra, something as minor as the main character’s smooth skin or brand of shoes.

Whether the work is done behind the computer, behind the wheel, behind the sink, behind the chopping board or behind the planggana, it is under-represented, if not entirely missing. This is not much of an argument but an observation.

One would probably argue that life itself is work, but that is of course another story. What I am trying to bring up here is the very means of acquiring money for the food on our tables, the very means of living that strangely exists like a ghost in fiction. You don’t see anything, but you’d know it is there, somewhere.

With a little bit of Googling, I found out that the unemployment rate in the Philippines was reported at 6.4 percent in October 2011, a considerable drop from the previous month’s 7.1 percent. It sounds reassuring but not entirely.

Although this sounds like an economist’s report, it must not be denied that young professionals make up a good chunk of the workforce in the Philippines, especially in the BPO industry. And with the class of 2012 graduating soon, jobs would once again be at the center in many people’s lives. Therefore, the youth will always be involved.

As for the young writers, I guess they ought to be aware, just like how Rizal is aware of almost everything.

The essayist Alain De Botton said that people “rely on writers to help explain the world” to them. So, have writers explained the world of the daily toil sufficiently? Should there be a need to explain it? And why don’t we just leave both the working class struggle and the high society’s eternal discontent to men behind journalism?

Given its very subjective nature, it is no wonder work in literature tends to be sidelined as an accessory. But the answers to the questions mentioned earlier would all boil down to this fact: We are in hard times, affected in one way or another.

The overall weakening state of the world economy alone paints a picture that we are linked together by consequences. And it is strange a strong theme such as this is ignored. But why is it ignored? Young contemporary writers have reasons, of course. Work could be plainly boring. It could be inessential. It could be too distancing from pop culture. It could be anything.

But the novelist and journalist John Lanchester has a detailed idea in his article “Why Fiction Breaks Down.” He said that although fiction “can be fantastical, wild… incoherent, even mad,” it has “to feel true. It has to generate a world of its own and create a satisfying internal order within that world.”

“But there are limits, and one of them is to do with unlikeliness.” He said “Fiction copes badly with unlikeliness. The bizarre is fine. But sheer unlikeliness, improbability, things that simply shouldn’t have happened or feel as if they couldn’t have happened, even after you know they have—that is likely to break a fictional world.”

And because of this unlikeliness, along with his deduction that modern work is so complicated one can’t thoroughly explain in fiction the “complex realities of different working lives,” a story about work tends to collapse.

In other words, the nature of predictability of what we already know or seem to know (e.g. CEO, window washer) tends to be unbelievable compared to what we are unfamiliar with (e.g. Remedios the Beauty ascending to the heavens, Piscine Patel boating with a Bengal tiger). We can be appalled by the most ordinary of things.

But this is, of course, just another reason, and which, if tweaked a little further, could also be considered an excuse.

I asked a couple of young practicing writers (who are also taking full/part time jobs) on how they see the relevance of work in literature.

Marguerite Alcazaren De Leon, web writer, said, “Whether we like it or not, we live in a capitalist society, so making a living has become a primary concern that informs our decisions and actions.”

Glenn Diaz, freelance writer, also said that “As far as realist fiction is concerned, economics entraps and frees people and, therefore, the characters. In the Philippines especially, where the distribution of wealth is highly uneven, good literature should attest to it.”

Some had another outlook though. Copywriter Mo Francisco said, “I guess it’s not so important unless integral to the story. Citing a job is an easy way to help characterize a person, setting, etcetera, but things shouldn’t be dependent on it.”

From the side of the established writers, their takes are much more encompassing than particularizing. The fictionist and essayist Susan Lara said, “Anything could be a worthy subject of a literary piece, as long as you can make it interesting, and of course, resonate.”

The poet and critic J. Neil Garcia does not think that livelihood is any more worthy as a literary theme than other themes. He said, “Human experience is fair fame. The literary treatment of human experience deepens the understanding of it.”

Differing opinions, yes, just like the types of work we have. There’s the blue collar job and there’s the white collar job. Others don’t have a collar at all.

With this year’s Philippine Arts Festival theme, “Tradisyon at Inobasyon,” the concept of the daily toil could be as relevant as ever. With tradisyon, we could acknowledge again the fundamental hard-working Filipino. And with inobasyon, we could acknowledge the developments of how work shapes us and how we shape works. We could both face the past and the present.

It is not that stories about love or the mananggal aren’t enjoyable. It is not that there are no recognizable truths in those stories either. I simply think the time calls for it, to resurrect and highlight the real face of labor, warts and all, in literature.

Work may be a tedious matter, even daunting, but it would always be a part of the human condition. And with literature, we could grapple it down, tame it. This is the strength of the written word. I guess Wislawa Szymborska, the Polish poet who died last February 1, says it best with her poem “The Joy of Writing.”

Writing, to quote the last two lines of the poem, is “The power of preserving./ Revenge of the mortal hand.”

*

Presented last February 9 for the conference session “Under 35: Young Writers and Their Milieu” in the 2012 Taboan Philippine Writers Festival at Fontana Leisure Park, Clark Field, Pampanga.

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

12th iyas creative writing workshop call for submissions


The 12th IYAS Creative Writing Workshop is now accepting applications. The workshop will be held from April 22 – 28 at the University of St. La Salle in Bacolod City. Fellows will be given a grant to cover board and lodging and partial transportation subsidy. The panelists will be Dr. Marjorie Evasco, Ms. Grace Monte de Ramos, Dr. D.M. Reyes, Dr. Genevieve Asenjo, Prof. John Iremil Teodoro, and Dr. Ronald Baytan.
RULES

Applicants, using a pseudonym, should submit original works of any of the following: Poetry (6 poems); Short Stories (2 short stories); or One-Act Plays (2 plays).

Use font size 12; submit 5 computer-encoded hard copies of entries, bound or fastened, in separate folders, with in data CD.

Submissions must be accompanied by a sealed size 10 business envelope containing the author’s real name and pseudonym, a 2x2 ID photo, and a short resume; entires must be mailed on or before March 11.

Entries in Cebuano, Hiligaynon, Tagalog, or Filipino may be submitted. Fellowships are awarded by genre and by language.

SUBMIT APPLICATIONS TO:

Darlyn Simbiling
Iyas Secretariat
University of St. La Salle, Bacolod City
FOR INQUIRIES:darlyn_omori@yahoo.com

*

IYAS was an experience. With Ma’am Elsa Coscolluela sparking a wonderful idea in my head, I learned a lot from this workshop. I believed it would be my last, too. Unless, of course, I would stumble on another creative block.